INSIDE THE SOUL-CRUSHING CORPORATE MACHINE: Sad Stories, Satire, Sarcasm, Rants, Hopeful Cynicism, and Lessons Learned
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You might possibly think that you wouldn’t want to read a book about a business system like the soul-crushing corporate machine where layoffs, back-stabbing, and brainless management decisions are rampant. For example, you might think, “That sounds like my company and I’m depressed enough already.” Or you might think, “I don’t work in place like that and you couldn’t pay me enough to join one.”
But if you work in a soul-crushing company, it might be helpful to find out more about them. And if you don’t, you might want to know what to avoid.
Not only that, the soul-crushing corporate machine can be pretty entertaining. There are characters like Ladder-Climbing Larry and Gluttonous Glen. And the anger-management-challenged CEO who shaved his head to demonstrate contempt for his employees and motivate them to greater productivity. And the office manager who counted cars in the company parking lot on snowy days to make sure that employees were not skipping out on work just because it was too dangerous to drive. And the human resources director who wasn’t quite as “touchy feely” as he pretended to be. And the company president who accidently laid off his best business developer but just couldn’t admit that he made a mistake. And the executives who laid off an entire office by video tape. And the project management consultant who decided to use a Reign of Terror as a motivation tool.
Oh yes, the soul-crushing corporate machine is a veritable fountain of characters, stories, and lessons about what not to do.
Written with liberal doses of ranting, sarcasm, cynicism, humor, and hope, this book will help you to understand, survive, and/or avoid the soul-crushing business world – and to keep soul-crushing practices from spreading.
Chapter 1: A Soul-Crushing Company?
Chapter 2: I Get Sucked into the Soul Crushing Corporate Machine – and Survive
Chapter 3: Layoff Mania
Chapter 4: Layoff Intermission
Chapter 5: More Layoff Mania
Chapter 6: Head Shaving and Other Dubious Motivational Methods
Chapter 7: We’re from Human Resources and We’re Here to Help
Chapter 8: Leaders that Follow the Soul-Crushing Leader
Chapter 9: Teamwork: Soul-Crushing Corporate Machine Style
Chapter 10: In Our Soul-Crushing Company We Trust (or Not)
Chapter 11: Management 9-1-1
Chapter 12: How to Take a Highly Motivated, Profitable Group and Send it into a Death Spiral
Chapter 13: Clients: The Good, The Bad, and The Corporate Death Stars
Chapter 14: How to Recognize a Soul-Crushing Company
Chapter 15: A Career Survival Guide for the Soul-Crushing Corporate Machine
Chapter 16: Farewells
Chapter 17: Lessons Learned and Suggestions for a Non-Soul-Crushing Workplace
The Cynic’s Soul-Crushing Corporate Machine Glossary